Friday, April 4, 2008

The Power of Influence

Eve knew it (Gen 3). Deliah knew it (Judges 16). God has given women the ability to have some influence over men. What was it about Eve that caused Adam to follow her? Did Eve flash Adam a winning smile? Did she turn the perfect phrase? Why didn't he stop her? How could she in such a simple moment convince the incarnate heartbeat of God to disobey him? She influenced him. I'm not saying that Adam was a push-over. She just had a way with him and it caused him to sin.

God has given women the power of influence. Influence is when you effectively alter someone else’s perceptions, views, beliefs, attitudes, decisions thus altering their actions.

As the Marketing and Training Coordinator at the university, my effectiveness is directly correlated to my ability to influence. The expert influencer understands people, how they think, what makes them tick and how to get on the same wave-lengh.

Successful leaders, entrepreneurs and agents of change, know and appreciate the power to influence; they do not leave things to chance and hope they make a good impression they plan and practice their strategy to ensure success.

As a marketing manager, as a teacher, as a parent, I know the power of my influence. I use my influence everyday.

God has been dealing with me about the power of influence I have in my marriage. God has put in us the power of influence. What I do with it can either build my husband up in Christ or tear him down.

It seems one of the biggest reasons we fail to affirm our mates is because we're too preoccupied with ourselves. Praising and affirming your mate takes a conscious act of your will. It means changing my thinking from, "What's good for me?" to "What's best for my spouse?" And when we change our focus, we will automatically look for the good in our spouses. Learn to see the positive side, and let your mate know how much you appreciate his strengths.

I am grateful all the time for my husband taking care of us financially, spiritually, emotionally and many other ways. But I need to tell him - even before he really steps up to the plate in some areas. I need to speak over him a vision for what I know he can be.

Today I thanked him for working so hard at work. He took me to lunch - just the two of us - after he received his quarterly bonus. Tonight I will thank him for being attentive to our children. Tomorrow I think will thank him for being a great host to our extended family. I will start thanking him for hearing me out when I had a bad day. I want to build a habit of daily praise, to purpose to say one nice thing each day to my partner. I need to tell him often that I think he is such a man. Warrior talk if you will.

I want to make him feel like a man. So that he knows I respect him. Men crave respect just as we crave love. I want to speak that into his life.

If you can't speak that into your husbands life yet, start praying for ways that you can. Start being deliberate about finding something you can thank him for, rather than nag him for. Nagging never works. You might get what you want, but it won't be how you want it. He'll do it because he's sick of hearing you nag. Just ask Deliah and take a note from the Bible: Proverbs 27:15-16 A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day; restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil with the hand.

I know that I can be prone to being quarrelsome. I know that this can come from not getting your needs met. He doesn't meet your needs, you don't meet his, so he doesn't meet yours. Around and around it goes. But, I need to be the one to decide to make a change. Stop the cycle. I want to be the one who speaks life into my husband. Speak honor. Speak respect. I think that we just might notice our world is a lot more wonderful.

Our words hold the power to drive our husbands into a cave or to raise your men into Warriors.

Speak wisely.

Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Prov. 16:24
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