Prolific Men of Letters Pass

I just read that John Updike died. I cried. I first "met" John Updike as an undergraduate in Art Saltzman's class reading "Rabbit, Run." My first impluse was to e-mail Dr. Saltzman and thank him for introducing me to such a great writer. So I went to the MSSU English page where I read:

Art Saltzman Dies Suddenly: Click here.

Longtime colleague Art Saltzman died on January 8, 2008, at home. He was just 54. His death leaves a huge hole in the department, which had enjoyed his presence for 26 1/2 years. Art was laid to rest in a graveside service in Chicago on January 11. A memorial service was held on February 3, from 2:00 to 3:30, in the Spiva Gallery on campus. Saltzman family members were also present. A prolific author, outstanding teacher, and good colleague, Art will be missed.
To read the Chicago Tribune obituary notice and the guestbook, posted January 10, click here.

I should have thanked him sooner

A Generous Wife

I keep in contact with several of my former students. Working at the university makes it easy to run into quite a few of them - so does facebook.com. Yesterday, as I often do, I heard about one of my dear former students, who recently got married. It seems that she's having trouble being a wife. After hearing that sex is taboo for so long it's odd to think that it's all of a sudden alright.

And it's not just with my newly married friends that being sexually intimate seems to be a problem either. I have many friends in the "we have babies at home and man, I'm tired" stage of life. I'm there too! About a year ago I started looking for something to help me put my mind on track with who I needed to be, who I was called to be, for my husband. After much prayer, I ran across quite a few great things, providentially.

The first is a website, a community, called The Generous Wife. The author will even send daily tips to your inbox. It's just a little tidbit reminding you about things you can do to make your husband feel special. For so long -and he still does - Billy gets leftovers. After everyone else is taken care of, he's last in line. Sometimes that's the nature of the business, I understand, but there are things that I can do for him to remind him of who he is for me - for our family. But first I just have to think about him. Add him to "the list" so to speak.

Then yesterday I heard of a new book coming out from Shannon Etheridge, who says, "female sexuality isn’t an embarrassing taboo, but an enriching treasure! Most women today are sexually competent. They know what to do in the bedroom... But I want more than that for you. I want you to be sexually confident.

Sexual confidence isn’t just for the supermodel or porn star. It’s the birthright of every woman, and the deep desire of every husband for his wife. It’s also a valuable legacy that we pass down to our own daughters and granddaughters as they are seeking to understand, embrace, and celebrate their own sexuality within marriage." That is exciting to me - a birthright, really? I'd always heard it talked about like a chore, something to take care of.

On her blog she has a community of women who prove the idea that women want to be the wife they were called to be, but have some obstacles to overcome. Don't we all?

And finally, Today's Christian Woman Online is a get resource to understand how other Christian women feel and cope. It has information about many, many topics. It's helped me to re-focus when I can't seem to see the big picture anymore. When I feel like I must be the only one going through this of having these feelings, it shows me just how many of us struggle with the same things.

I learned that just becasuse it isn't working now, doesn't mean with prayer and understanding that it won't work.

Strong Roots are Essential

I am taking a webinar through FranklinCovey based on the book The Speed of Trust. Initially, they asked participants to enlist their friends and co-workers to take a survey about their perceptions of me, my work, etc. It was quite a scary thing to do - to ask people to tell you what they thought about trusting you.

One of the concepts in the webinar talks about "the core four" Intention, Integrity, Competence and Results - these things are measures of trust -a measure of whether to extent trust - to accept trust. The visual was a tree where Competence and Results were the leaves and branches - the visible above ground. Intention and Integrity are the roots - the things underground, unseen - the support. Strong roots are essential to produce fruit that others can see - results than prove competence.

Asking people to rate your trustworthiness made me wonder, What if someone followed me around with a video camera all day documenting my every move? Catching on camera all of my words, facial expressions, actions, and reactions. And then what if someone packaged it all together and played it on some sort of reality TV show for all the world to see. What would be the glaring message of my life?

I am convicted thinking about this.

You see, if someone were to ask me, what are you all about? I would have some nice sounding answers. But what actually happens during the strains of everyday life can sometimes betray my best intentions.

Let's just be honest, it's tough being a sold out Christian stuck in a flesh-filled body.

I realize there is a place for God's tender mercies for me in all this. But I also know that while no TV cameras are following me around, my life is speaking a message about what I really believe and I want that message to honor Jesus.

Recovering Teacher

AS another school year comes to a close and I watch all of my teacher friends crawl, exhausted from their classroom, emerging like bears after hibernation or a cat scrambling to get out of water! I am laughing uncontrolably!

I love being a "recovering teacher" I just lock my office up at the end of the day -whenever I decide the end of the day should be - and go home - no boxes, bags of folders to lug. I'm done. I'm elated. I'm virtually stress free!

I thought it only fitting to revisit Jeff Foxworthy's take on teachers

YOU might be a teacher if...

...you believe the playground should be equipped with a Ritalin salt lick

...you want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:30 and have summers off ..it is difficult to name your own child because there's no name you can come up with that doesn't bring high blood pressure as it is uttered

...you can tell it's a full moon or if it going to rain, snow, hail...anything!!! Without ever looking outside

...you believe, "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on a report card ...you believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today." ...when out in public, you feel the urge to snap your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior

...you have no social life between August and June

...you think people should have a government permit before being allowed to reproduce

...you wonder how some parents MANAGED to reproduce

...you laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge."

...you encourage an obnoxious parent to check into charter schools or home schooling and are willing to donate the UHAUL boxes should they decided to move out of district

...you think caffeine should be available in intravenous form

...you can't imagine how the ACLU could think that covering your students chair with Velcro and then requiring uniforms made out of the corresponding Velcro could ever be misunderstood by the public

...meeting a child's parent instantly answers the question, "Why is this kid like this?" ...you would choose a mammogram over a parent conference

...you think someone should invent antibacterial pencils and crayons...and desks and chairs for that matter!!!

...the words "I have college debt for this?" has ever come out of your mouth

.... you know how many days, minutes, and seconds are left in the school year-but in the summer you are trying to pretend like it's never starting again!

End of the Year Teacher Gift

We all know how busy teachers are, especially at the end of the year with report cards, programs, and packing up classrooms for the summer. So as the homeroom mom, I dediced that we are going to save them some time. As a "recovering teacher" I know that this will be a much appreciated gift, plus it's free! (We are blowing the rest of tour party fund on a huge inflatable bouncer for the party.)

We are making a Teacher Cookbook! The students will each have a page with their picture and recipe on it. I told the parents that I need a quick time saving family favorite recipe, or two or three from each child. This letter went out Thursday, and out usual "paperwork day" is Tuesday...better late than never right? But I need them all by Tuesday, so I called on the parents on Saturday morning, just to make sure. When I get the pictures and recipes, then I'll print the pages and put it in book form with round metal hoops. Not too much trouble for a mom of 3 under 6 years with a full time job!

Variations
1. Bring gift cards to local eateries. The teacher loved the cards she got for her birthday! I’ll put something on the cabinet for us to attach them to or put them in –
2. Last Christmas, I made several batches of our family's secret recipe for cinnamon rolls in disposable cook-and-serve trays with lids. I put the icing in a Ziploc bag on top of the rolls, wrapped a large bow around the tray, and enclosed a card with instructions for heating. I also wrote that they could request one additional batch at any time in the future. The teachers later told me they began their Christmas with my family in mind and the rolls in their stomachs.
3. My best gift was actually for the end of the year when teachers are extra busy but it would work for any season. I prepared a full meal in foil baking dishes complete with entree, veggie, salad, homebaked bread, and even a bottle of wine. At the teacher's convenience, I delivered the meal to her home with directions on baking time. She was thrilled to have one less meal to worry about preparing for her family during such a busy time.
Variation ideas from FamilyFun.com

Dreams Deferred

This is a paper I helped my mother write for her college class at Texas Tech...

I wanted to be a waitress. I wanted a red gingham apron and maybe even a pair of skates like the car hops. I practiced serving dinner to my family at home, with my mothers help, of course. I wanted to be a waitress. I thought they got to eat all the leftovers. That was the real hook. Talk about a benefit package! But my mother told me you don’t get to eat everything you want and my aunt told me that people are mean to you sometimes.

So, looking for a new career, I watched people at work. I decided I wanted to be a teacher. I loved school. Teachers were always happy. And really, I wanted the big desk. But I fell in love with my high school sweetheart. And I chose to get married instead of going to college.

So I thought, “ok, a wife and mother. That’s not such a bad racket.” But while my husband was away being an electronics teacher at a business college, I was bored so I started going to school and helping a lady grade papers. A fellow student told me about a job opening. My husband decided we could use the money; so I went to work as a typist. It was too hard to work, keep house, and go to school so I quit going to school – again.

Ten years later, my dream of being a mother was fulfilled. Heather was everything I ever dreamed of: cute, funny, smart. We had so much fun together. I dressed her up, read to her, taught her, danced with her, laughed with her and cried with her.

When she was nine years old, the dream of being a wife died. So I put all my energies into my job and my two daughters. Quickly my job was at a dead end. I’d had all the titles, been in all the positions and mastered the skills. There was nothing else for me to do there so I just put in my time. My personal life was the source of my joy. The three of us had so much fun participating in school functions, going to church, and planning Camp Fire Girl activities. I relished watching them grow.

Before I knew it our time was almost over. The summer before Heather was going to be a sixteen-year-old senior in high school, she was going to a youth conference and I went along as a sponsor. She was planning on going out of state to college in a year. My dream was going to end again. I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. During the conference, I chose to attend a workshop about Chuck Colson. He had to have a job to get out of prison after Watergate and the only place that would hire him was an orphanage. The vivid images of hurting children consumed my senses. I was struck. The children looked just like the ones I taught in my Sunday School class, but their eyes told me that they were hurting and just wanted someone to love them. I could do that but I had two daughters and a job. It would be so hard to let go of the security of my long time career and all the benefits I had accumulated. Thoughts of that film came back to me consistently throughout the week. I just could not let go of the pictures of they eyes of those children. I started to dream that I could do something like that when the girls left home. I began to dream aloud to others.

Ten years after Chuck Colson’s experiences planted the possibilities of a dream, my youngest daughter announced that she was moving. She was gone the following weekend. Over the next thirty days, I retired from my job of 36 years, sold my home and moved to Lubbock. Since the day I saw that video, I’d said that, ‘once the girls left home, I was going to make a difference in the lives of children.’ My first day as a Lubbock resident, I was hired by the Children’s Home of Lubbock to be a relief house parent and by Trinity Schools to be a substitute teacher. I was going to make a difference here.

Both daughters have always told me that I should go to college – become a teacher. And Summer I of 2003, I became a college freshman. I’m going to be a great teacher.

Dreams do come true after all and I couldn’t be happier.